War! What is it good for? Absof#*kinglutely NOTHING!

The Mummy wars are real. And they are bullshit. It HAS to stop. No one way of parenting is better than the other.

Sure, we all know the medical benefits of breast milk. We also know that the pressure to breastfeed can break a woman in two. We have all given birth in different ways and we would all have things we would do the same and things would do differently. We all have opinions, we all have a preferred way of doing things, a brand of formula we prefer, family traditions we follow, and we all have things that we don’t share for fear of being publicly ridiculed. Why? Because people are basically self-entitled assholes who seem to think they have the god given right to tell you how to raise your child.

I would like to try a little experiment tonight, if I may.

This is me with two of my best Mummy friends, J and B. We have a little Facebook group chat that never, and I mean NEVER stops. We have been there for each other through so much in the last 2+ years. We all have kids. We all do and have done things differently. And we love each other for it.

These are our children! Quite a good looking bunch if I do say so myself.

Here is a list of stats for our little families. You look at the pictures and the stats and then you tell me which stat belongs to which Mummy/kid combo.

We are three mummies. Between us we have 8 kids. That’s enough for some kind of sports team!

All of our children were conceived spontaneously. Two of us were about to seek fertility treatment when we fell pregnant.

One of these children was born by emergency C-section.

Three were born by planned C-section.

Two were delivered by forceps.

Two were delivered without assistance.

Five of these children were classified as premature.

One of these children was 11 days overdue.

Three of these children spent time in Special Care.

One of us had Gestational Diabetes.

One of us had Cervical Incompetence.

One of us had Obstetric Cholestasis.

One of these babies was exclusively breastfed for 14 months.

One is currently being exclusively breastfed (4 months and counting)

All of these babies had some amount of breastmilk

One of these babies was mix fed for 18 weeks before going to all formula.

Three of these babies was mix fed for three weeks before going to all formula.

Two of these babies were breastfed for ten days before switching to all formula.

Three of these kids were Baby Led weaned.

Four of these kids had purees first.

All of these children are fully vaccinated.

One of these mothers is single.

One of these mothers works full time for a very busy government department. One is a writer. One is a student.

We all play Pokemon Go. We are not ashamed. #gottacatchemall

All of our children are healthy. All of our children are happy. All of our children got exactly what they needed on the inside and on the outside. Love. Nourishment. Attention. Medical assistance. How, it doesn’t make a blind bit of difference.

So STOP shaming other mothers for doing things differently to how you would. If you are asked for advice, GO NUTS! Tell them what you did and why it worked for you. DO not tell them what they have to do. Do not give advice when it is not asked for. Do not shame another Mother for making choices different to your own.

Be proud of your parenting achievements, but be humble. Congratulate all the other Mums around you for the stellar job they are doing. Because every single day of this job is hard. It is demanding. It is relentless. It is emotional.

And it is also the single most rewarding thing anyone can ever do.